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God is straightening out our crooked selves and we become wise. J esus came from his home in the infinitely loving Trinity into our world. He came to restore us to the image and likeness of God. He cured our brokenness by drawing it all into himself and, in unimaginable agony, he struggled relentlessly to trust that his Father would raise him up and heal him and all humanity along with him. This the Father did, and the remedy for all our brokenness was revealed. He sacrificed his own control of everything so as to leave open completely the door for the Father to pour in his infinitely loving grace. Thereafter, the cure for all our ills is to follow him into the Father’s heart. The Spirit of Jesus leads us on this journey, and in that place of grace we gradually allow him to love us to perfection. That is how we achieve integrity. Integrity is where our fractured selves are coming together and we become who we are meant to be. The Journey to integrity necessarily involves pain, which we can either fight and rage against, or we can undergo with our crucified Christ. The Greek poet Aeschylus expressed it well when he wrote: “He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep, pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God” (Agamemnon). I am not saying that many of us achieve wholeness in this life, but we make striking progress if we allow the hand of God to mould us. That might involve a gradual lessening of our capacities and self-sufficiency. We may suffer indignity, loss of mental clarity and have to rely on others for help. Yet inwardly there can be an integration of our being which does not depend on bodily health or freedom. We can become humble as we gradually realise how much we are loved. With that comes a growing tranquillity as we experience God’s grace leading us along the path of personal integration. The book of Daniel (12: 3) says: “Those who are wise shall shine like the brightness of the universe, and those who turn to righteousness like the stars forever and ever”. But to “shine like stars” we have a long journey to complete in the process of becoming so totally pure and perfect that we are able to live forever within the Trinity. Johann Sebastian Bach beautifully expressed the mystery of the human ascent into the family of God: “Word of God, our flesh that fashioned, with the fire of life impassioned, striving still to truth unknown, soaring, dying round Thy throne” (Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring). What can seem like dying, can instead be our innermost selves being brought to life under the profound cherishing of our Father. Thus ‘comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God’.

I was out walking. It was good exercise; it was bracing. Walking keeps you fit; the fresh air does you good. It is especially uplifting in spring. There is the promise of new life in the air, and sunnier days. I was thinking to myself “Lent” is an old word for “spring”, the lengthening of growth. Lent is a fresh start: it calls us to roll up our sleeves, to come closer to God and live better lives. At the end is the great feast of resurrection. What a positive message! So I was walking along thinking positive thoughts. It was good. Then I met a vagabond going the other way. Their looked a mess and shuffled along. But there was something in their eyes that spoke of a struggle to fulfil a great purpose. This encounter got under my skin; it unsettled me. I asked the Lord who is that. He said it is me. Have I been treating Lent too lightly?

WHAT IS METAPHYSICS ANYWAY? The Greek word “physica” means 'what is natural', 'what can be observed and measured'. Generally it is the physical world and the exploring of the physical world. It is the realm of science . The way Science works is to suggests a theory and experiments with it, until it arrives at scientific facts - something that is proven beyond doubt. An example of that is giving paracetamol to people with a headache and it healing them. Those facts which have been proved then give rise to new theories which need to be tested, and so scientific knowledge grows. We know a lot of facts, and we have some pretty impressive theories that people are working on, like cures for cancer and Einstein’s theory of relativity. The Greeks had another word, "meta", meaning "above and beyond" which they added to the word “physica” to describe thinking about the principles which govern all human thought and activity, including how scientific research is carried out. They called this branch of study “Metaphysics” . This is the realm of principles which are not observable, and need to be assumed. Simply put, it is the overall view of things which each one of us adopts. These can be described as “world-views”. There are many of them like the way cynics think everything is meaningless, or sceptics think you can’t trust anything. There is definitely a Christian World-view. THE Christian WORLD-VIEW I listened to a discussion between Dr Jordan Peterson the psychiatrist and thinker and Dr Christopher Dawkins the famous atheist, in which Peterson demonstrated that the scientific endeavour arose out of the Christian world-view. They are the following: Truth tends towards unity, it doesn’t contradict itself. There is a logical order that is intrinsic to the cosmos. That fundamental order is good. It is intelligible to human beings. Discovering that order and aligning ourselves with it makes life more abundant. Ultimately, the truth will set you free. He goes on to make the point that these axioms are religious and derive from the Judeo-Christian world-view. Otherwise, how can you account for way science emerged in Europe? Then he states the fact that this system of thought is under attack from all quarters today, which threatens the whole search for knowledge including science. Dr Dawkins agreed. Until recently, the Judeo-Christian metaphysical substrata underpinning science was intact, and enabled great advances in our universities. Now they are being questioned, with people's feelings being put over as more valid than rigourous truth. Such confused thinking threatens to erode excellence. How has this happened? It is because people have taken the clothes of Christianity, and rejected the body within. Without the body the clothes become a shapless pile. Christianity does not have a body of thought and knowledge at its centre - it has the person of Christ, the incarnate Word of God. The knowing of him is not just in our minds, but in our hearts and being. It is fundamentally a relationship, heart-to-heart with God, not a set of convictions. This relationship whith Him who is the Word , truth itself, leads us to the fullness of life and also of science.

LOVE v WILL POWER For years I have heard spiritual guides saying that it is our wills that are crucial in the prayer of the heart. I have to admit that I have found it difficult to make sense of this, because it sounds like muscular Christianity which I have found inadequate. I imbibed a strong moralising religion as a child, which meant learning what was right and willing myself to do it – this was especially reinforced by the image of a fearsome God who was keeping the score. The result was a sense of failure combined with frequent resolutions to do better. I know that was not true religion, which is about relating to the God who is love. What I was practicing was a throwback to Old Testament keeping of the law. I think that is what Jesus was talking about when he described John the Baptist as the greatest man born of woman, but added ‘yet the least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he is’ . He said: ‘Since John the Baptist came, up to this present time, the kingdom of heaven has been subjected to violence and the violent are taking it by storm’ . (Matthew 11, 11). Muscular Christianity with its stress on will power uses violence against self and even against others to take the kingdom of heaven by storm. So why do the greatest spiritual guides keep saying that the will is central? A clue lies in The Catechism of the Catholic Church’s chapter on prayer (paragraph 2563). The explanation begins with the heart: “The heart is the dwelling-place where I live. According to the Semitic (Jewish) or Biblical expression, the heart is the place ‘to which I withdraw.’ The heart is our hidden centre, beyond the grasp of our reason and of other people; only the Spirit of God can fathom the human heart and know it fully.” The Catechism’s explanation then shifts the focuses to the heart’s movement and actions beyond itself: “The heart is the place of decision , deeper than our psychic drives. It is the place of truth, where we choose life or death. It is the place of encounter, because as images of God we live through relationship: it is the place of covenant” (my underlining). I find the words ‘decision’ and ‘choose’ more helpful than ‘will’. As I spend time in silent prayer seeking the face of God, with the conscious attempt to love him and let myself be loved by him, it is the constant renewing of the decision and choice which gradually solidifies an attitude of love in my heart. Much of the time, there is no feeling or understanding of this living relationship, but, as time goes on, I am aware that that relationship is an attitude developing in my heart. That awareness rises up from my heart to my mind more and more throughout the day and night. It is like a catch of a tune springing up in the mind. But the word ‘will’ or 'will power' certainly describes the strength needed when there is temptation. I find that it is easier to resist temptation when I am aware of the Father’s love and Jesus’ closeness. It is when these are obscured that my will must operate most strongly. Usually it is not a matter of willing to do something, but rather a tenacious clinging on in the dark to the hand of God. That takes grit, in which I am often lacking, but as the relationship grows I expect my will to grow stronger. WHAT IS THE USE OF TEMPTATION? We might ask: what does temptation have to do with contemplation? Temptation is never far away from one who contemplates. The Evil One knows only too well what power for good flows from the lovers of God. He hates contemplation and tries to disrupt it whenever he can. Thankfully, God shields his lovers much of the time, but at others he permits us to be tempted. It is not that he is abandoning us then, but he is turning the Devils weapons back on his own head. Each time we overcome temptation with the help of God's grace, not only is the Devil weakened, but also our own inner self grows stronger. It is in that struggle, that we are tested and purified like gold in a furnace. When undergoing temptation it is important to remember four basic Catholic teachings. God will never allow us to be tempted beyond our strength. But often we will not appreciate what strength we have with the aid of God's grace until after struggle is over. All temptations eventually pass. Temptation is not sin. Sin is where we willingly indulge a temptation and welcome it into our souls. Then it restricts our capacity to experience God's love. In that state of deprivation we allow evil to become stronger in ourselves and the whole world. Temptations arise from virtues that are wounded and twisted. Anger, for instance, is a God-given power of our soul to remove evil with extraordinary force. When anger is diseased, that force is used to harm and hurt. The saints and spiritual teachers mean something much deeper than 'will power' when they use the word 'will'. We shall consider that in Chapter 12 in this series 'Prayer of the heart'. QUESTION How are you finding my thoughts on the prayer of the heart/contemplation? I am sure I myself only see a small part of this deepest activity of our spirit. Would you care to add something of your own thoughts and experience? Use the 'comment on this article' button below.

On the feast of the Presentation in the Temple (2 nd February), the readings of the Mass shouted one message to me, God is counter-intuitive . We read from the prophet Malachi's book which is the last in the Old Testament. He prophesied that the final age in the long story of humanity would begin when “the Lord you are seeking will suddenly enter his Temple” . Every time the Lord entered his Temple in the past it was dramatic - the arrival of the breath-taking cloud of his presence made people fall to the ground in worship. But today the Lord enters quietly as a tiny baby in his mother’s arms. The event was unnoticed except by an old man and an old woman, Simeon and Anna. Surely, the High Priest and all the ministers of the magnificent Temple should have been there for such an epoch-making occurence. No, these two humble people represented the real achievement of Israel from the time of Abraham - holiness. For all their amazing history, the Jews had only produced a small group of devout lovers of God, but, in God’s eyes that is enough to call down the Messiah. God only needed a small plot of good earth for the Word of God to leap down and sow the seed of the new age. Were King Herod and all the civic dignitaries summoned from Jerusalem to officially meet the new-born King? No, just some night-workers, shepherds from the hills around Bethlehem. How counter-intuitive is that? Horoscopes are foolishness, yet when God manifests the world’s saviour to the gentile world, it is Magicians, star-gazing writers of horoscopes that he chooses to be the representatives of the world. Fools they may be, but also earnest seekers of the truth. They are the best that a needy world can offer. You have to be earnest fools to travel hundreds of miles believing you have discovered the route in the stars. Finally, God chooses you, the least of his children, to be his dearest child! On second thought, it isn’t that God is counter-intuitive, it is us who have everything backwards. When mankind fell, what a fall we had! Thank God the resurrection is now under way. But it is holy, humble, earnest fools who will be God’s tools as he brings it about.

St. Carlos Acutis - a saint is in his youth is calling to others

THE NEW COVENANT  GIVEN IN THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT

WHAT was Jesus talking about? Last Sunday’s Gospel tells us that Jesus went all over Galilee preaching “Repent, for the kingdom of Heaven is at hand” . Do we know what he meant by “repent”? English has a narrow definition of the word 'REPENT'. For us, it focuses on human sin. It is about having remorse for a specific sin which we have to confess and turn away from; it leads to a call for God’s mercy. The Gospel of Matthew was written in Greek. Here Jesus uses the word “metanoia”, which means “to turn your life in another direction”. Here the stress is not on what we turn from but where or who we turn to. It is intimately directed to the God of mercy, compassion, faithful love and grace. So Christian repentance is primarily about opening our hearts to God’s love. In January we began the Sunday Mass readings of Year A in Ordinary Time. This is a time of new beginnings. The Church, in choosing these readings on the 3 rd Sunday of Ordinary Time, is calling us to make the New Year’s resolution of turning more deeply to the God of love. It is a time to ask some questions. Am I coasting along - not depending much on the loving God? Am I comfortable as I am? Has my once radical ambition to follow Jesus like the fishermen who leave their boats and nets grown cold? Do I need to hear the divine call afresh? It is no use embarking with the Church on a new year of grace unless I am determined to open my heart more deeply to the infinite love which is calling at the deepest level of my being. It is less than three weeks to Lent . Am I going to leave thinking about it till the last minute? Holy Spirit kindle in us the fire of your love!

SOME OF THE MARVELOUS CATHOLICS THAT WE MET AT NEW DAWN 2025 I was Chair of the committee who organised the Charismatic Days of Renewal at Hopwood Hall in the 1970s and 80s, a position I left to concentrate on parish work for the next 35 years. It has been interesting to visit the New Dawn Charismatic Conferences in 2024 at Walsingham and 2025 at Barton. What struck me most was the way the first experiences of spiritual renewal of the early days has now matured into a lay people increasingly stepping forward with dedication and authority to serve the Church in cooperation with the clergy. The authority comes from increasing closeness to God and dedicated attention to their own formation. I heard the stories of some amazing people – let me tell you about a few of them. Deacon David (himself not a layman) told me of 5 men entering the Church in his parish in Northwich this Easter. He called it “the Quiet Revolution”. If you look on this website at Straws in the Wind you will read more about the “Quiet Revolution”. People are increasingly turning to the Church in this age which has drenched them in trivia and misinformation, especially men. Karen told me about the Perpetual Adoration in her Church, St Joseph’s in Stockport, and how it is changing the parish and the area. Where there is Adoration, there is contemplation, which leads to intercession, the prayer that moves mountains. That is what our new book is about; it is the secret weapon of the Church. Have a look at Our Role in God’s Plan on this website. Declan, a psychiatric nurse, told me about how he and others organise a study session on Zoom from 7.00 to 8.00 every weekday morning. Last year they went through the bible with Fr Mike Schmitz, and this year they are following his Catechism in a Year. There are about 70 people taking part, and around 200 have participated. We put our ministry, Hopeful Catholics , under the patronage of St John Henry Newman. Our inspiration is this vision of his: ‘What I desire in Catholics is the gift of bringing out what their religion is. I want a Laity, not arrogant, not rash in speech, not disputatious, but people who know their religion … who enter into it, who know their creed so well that they can give an account of it, who know so much of history that they can defend it.’ Newman would rejoice to hear of this early morning study. Nancy May , an ex-lawyer from Edinburgh, spoke with joy of her Masters Degree in Theology, which she had taken not so that she could create better job opportunities, but so that she could serve the Church in her parish, especially as a catechist for first communion children. She isn’t being reactive by just repeating material she has been given, but proactive seeking to give it her best. Rachel , who works for Rachel’s Vineyard, told me of how her own experience helps her to help women who have had abortions. She said that many despair because they think it is the unforgivable sin, and that almost all those she encounters were broken people long before they had their abortion(s). Her organisation offers reconciliation with God, integration of shattered selves and “futures full of promise” (Jeremiah 29: 11) not just to women who have had abortions, but also to mothers, fathers, grandparents, any family member and also those that worked in the abortion industry. She asked me to include this: Hurt by abortion? Contact rachel@rachelsvineyard.org.uk rachel@rachelsvieyard.org.uk rachel@rachelsvieyard.org.uk Owen , a young man who works for SPUC, the Society for the Protection of the Unborn Child , told me of his work with young people and students. It is very tough in Universities, where the Pro-abortion lobby are fanatically dominant. Yet there is change. Do you remember the shocking scenes in Manchester University in March of last year when some Pro-life Manchester students, most of whom are Catholic. left “terrified” as an out-of-control mob raised barricades, spat on them, threatened, and wished rape on them for their pro-life views? Owen said that on visiting them this year a remarkable thing has happened; many other students who were silent of hadn’t really thought about the issue had been so disgusted at the actions of the mob that they are coming out in support and genuinely inquiring about pro-life matters. That is a picture of modern-day martyrdom. Owen himself told me about how his friendship group at home numbering 16 were all atheists, but 6 of them are now Catholics. At university 5 friends joined the Church as well, also their professor who is now teaching scripture in a seminary in the USA. One couple spoke of their deep disappointment as their flourishing parish changed when a new parish priest came, but their charity and love are gradually having an impact. They are beacons of Christ’s hopeful people. It is not always bright skies; we will often be asked to pray our way through storms and dark moments, but “for those who love God all things work together for good,” (Romans 8: 28) Helen let us know about her own journey and how she was helped by Beginning Experience a ministry in the Catholic Church that addressed the needs of those who experienced loss of a spouse - whether through widowhood, separation or divorce. She is now working with them to help bring healing to others. These are just a few of the spirit-led Catholics we encountered. It was a joy to be there and so hopeful!